Tok 3 Tok 4

Sunday, May 14, 2006

What is in my Bag ?

This chibye silai,King's wife, wants to know what is inside the "Tai Yi Loong" (loan shark) bag that Lin Peh carry. Since she is such a fierce silai, Lin Peh really got no other way out but to reveal to the world what's inside the bag.

OK! First of all, "Tai Yi Loong" bag is NOT the official name of the bag. Lin Peh already checked with the Engrish sifu JKN and he told Lin Peh that the bag is call Waist Pouch! Just for your info, it's a Jiao-Jiao Air-Mani brand, and made of some dunno what lanjiao foreskin. Original listed price was Euro299 if you buy in Italy but Lin Peh bought it at RM19.90 from Jinjang Utara.

Unlike all the other silais who blaff the world by showing only selected items in their bags, Lin Peh is more honest ! OK...One Eye See All ! These are all the items in my waist pouch:

Clock wise from top left corner

  1. Glow in the dark type of whip. Use it when yamade with my piao mei. Try it ! Veli shiok wan! Lin Peh garanti you get multiple orgasms. You don't have to use the exact same type of whip that Lin Peh use. Something similar also can la. My friend Tan Sri Rojak told Lin Peh that he uses his belt and the result is just as good.

  2. Condoms. This one no need to explain cause the readers of Lin Peh blog probably "consume" 90% of the condoms in Malaysia. (Well....except...maybe... Ah May?)

  3. Penis ring. This is to wear at the lanjiao so dat the ring can block the cum from shooting and prolong the yamade activity. However please be very careful if you plan to wear one. Make sure you get the ring of correct size ! Don't try to be funny and wear the small small tight tight one unless you want the ring to squeeze your lanjiao so tight until your cum have to shoot from your nose! Worst still, if the ring is stuck to your lanjiao, you will not be able to pee for the rest of your life and your face will look like cocka.

  4. Indian God Oil. Just for info, the man with many hands at Jomel's Blog is NOT Indian God. Actually, the mask wearing pervert is Seng Kor who asked Lin Peh to buy the Indian God Oil on his behalf; that's why, Lin Peh has dat in the pouch now.

  5. Minyak Angin Cap Kapak. Minyak Angin is actually a must for safe sex. With the widespread of HIV, AIDS, STD, and all the ABC virus, regular yamade kakis such as 9393 and Boredfucker are practising double layer condoms for greater protection. However, Lin Peh is more safer then them cause Lin Peh rub the Minyak Angin in between the 2 layers ! Therefore, in the event of torn condom, either Lin Peh's lanjiao or the Piao Mei's chibye will feel the burnt from the Minyak Angin and we can stop the yamade immediately! Don't believe? Try it !

  6. Knife. Lin Peh have to carry this due to the nature of my job. I'm sure you all know that economy is not so good nowadays and collecting debt can be a big headache if Lin Peh do not use the proper tool.

OK. That's all. So, Auntie, please don't scold Lin Peh yeah ? ;-)

36 Condeminations:

Blogger Wuching condemn:

u should mass produce this kit set gerenti sell wan!

Blogger King's wife condemn:

yeah, wuching...good idea! All the perverts will sure buy!
Err...I want the whip. Buy from where ah?? LOL !!!!

Anonymous may condemn:

of course I don't "consume" it... it's not a consumable. kenot digest wan. unless it's fresh. banana flavoured.

Anonymous LB condemn:

How come May doesnt use condoms, ah?!!... Dangerous liao.

Blogger cockroach condemn:

tiu. i tot u got something jammed inside your big year hole!

Blogger Helen condemn:

MUAHRHARHAR like u always say, "Chibye!"

First and foremost, the foreskin pouch u better let the CSI team have a look. You never know whose foreskin is that.

Secondly, the whip is a nice touch, but you forgot to mention it's for the ladies. You're a M (as in BDSM) right? :-P

Hey, u apply wind oil on ur little bro ar?? Try rubbing some chili padi better.... lol

May - gasp, u naughty girl!! lol

Blogger wombie condemn:

I agree with wuching...mass produce this kit and also add in refill kits too!!!

If you use minyak angin, later sure smell like a granny or ah sum! ahahahahahaha

Blogger sengkor condemn:

oi! i pay u extra so tht u dun tell ppl i ask u to buy one.. blardy linpeh tableh harap!

Blogger AceOne condemn:

Wow, complete set wor. Where to get ar? Got sample set ar??

Blogger Wingz condemn:

"Make sure you get the ring of correct size ! Don't try to be funny and wear the small small tight tight one unless you want the ring to squeeze your lanjiao so tight until your cum have to shoot from your nose!"

WUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! mahai u toking from your sexperience izzit? lol

Blogger Cocka Doodle condemn:

That condom in your pouch with the size marked "XL".
Is that 'Extra Little' ah?


Blogger Ah Pek condemn:

waaahhh... i oso want this kind of bag!!

Blogger Lil Patchee condemn:

What's the Indian God Oil for ah? Minyak angin tak cukup ke? I thought your bag is like the one VCD sellers carry. ;)

Blogger sonikbyte condemn:

Haha indian oil ah... u think really can tahan for long long time meh.. works only for abunehneh maybe

Anonymous Anonymous condemn:

is there a female version of linpeh's bag or issit uniSEX!!?

Blogger See Fei condemn:

is there a female version of linpeh's bag or issit uniSEX!!?

Blogger Nine3 Nine 3 condemn:

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

Blogger Nine3 Nine 3 condemn:

How come no little TOUCH LIGHT ?
So can check in condition or not?

Blogger Lin Peh condemn:

Tank Q for the idea. Make sure u sappot a bit by buying a few containers ;-) LOL!

King's wife:
You want the whip ah ? I give to u as birthday present la ! LOL!

Banana flavoured no problem. But fresh or not kenot garanti la !

Dangerous leh ? Now onli u know the true Ah May huh ? LOL!

cockroach: understand your condemn. Next time use simpler not so deep Engrish la ;-)

You sked itu foreskin belong to your jantan mia ? LOL

Need to add soya sauce after adding
chili padi?! LOL

Minyak angin smell like a granny or ah sum? LOL! u speaking from expereince leh ?

seng kor:
Soli la Seng, Lin Peh is honest peeple la ;-)

U wan I make u one set la ! LOL!

U try u know la !

Cocka Doodle:
"XL" is extra large la ! But if u need extra little wan, just stuff some old newspaper inside lor ! LOL!

Ah Pek:
OK OK ! For Ah Pek version, got add itu Tiger Balm somemore ! ;-)

Lil Patchee:
Wat la u ! Indian Oil is for performance enhancement wan ! Dats why seng kor need. But Minyak Angin is for safe sex. 2 different dept la. ;-)

Please ask Seng Kor about the Indian Oil ! ;-)

See Fei:
Lin Peh is male so, mine is of course male version. But if u need a female version, Lin Peh can try customise one for u ! Just tell Lin Peh you requirements ;-)

Blogger Lin Peh condemn:

Nine3 Nine 3:
Torch Light itu Cocka mia bag sure ada cause he always go Africa wan ! LOL!

Blogger Nine3 Nine 3 condemn:

How come that day u got show me a special cap with a touch light on the cap also not in the bag.Sometime when we doggie you might gone wrong direction just like that night you told us the

Blogger Lin Peh condemn:

Nine3 Nine 3
Friend, u blurr already ah ? The one not I show one la. The one who showed you was Wingz! LOL!

Blogger Zara's Mama condemn:

I look at your face also I know you need Indian God oil one.. always tau taptap, ngan supsup.

Blogger Cocka Doodle condemn:

Aiyoh! You told Lil' Patchee that Indian oil is for performance wan.
I'm afraid her next question would be "LinPeh kor-kor...I am going to get married soon. Where can I buy a truckload for my husband ah?"

Blogger Nine3 Nine 3 condemn:

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

Blogger Nine3 Nine 3 condemn:

Zara mama..LinPeh got too many PioMei's to take care,I have advise him to get the PaoMei's cook soup for him.

" Cow-'Hai' steam with Pig-'Lung'

If he drink 3 Tiger also can Kill

Blogger Simple American condemn:

Don't your back hurt lugging all that stuff?

I see the glow in the dark whip could have some uses. But how you know where to whip until the whips gets there and where is there you wanna get? Do you get it?

Do you boil or fry condoms? I see that May puts them on bananas. Would that be fried banana? Is that where you use the Indian oil in the cooking?

Where is the lanjiao? I mapsearch it in KL and could not find. Why everybody wear a ring there? Is it some kind of religious thingie?

When you come to Texas leave the knife. You pull that out someone is gonna shoot you. We fix you up with a nice Colt .45 and you can be safe.

Blogger wombie condemn:

noler......I said that cos my grandma and aunties always smell like minyak angin mah. Not me lerr...I hardly touch that stuff

Blogger Samm condemn:

Ahhh, u must be the type who applies minyak angin between the double layer of condoms u wear during ur S&M sessions with your piao mei.

Blogger Lin Peh condemn:

Zara's Mama:
U toking about seng kor right ? ;-)

Cocka Doodle:
Her husband is Seng Kor ? LOL!

Nine3 Nine 3:
You can give my piaomei the recipe for the " Cow-'Hai' steam with Pig-'Lung' ah ? LOL!

Simple American:
Back no hurt cause I learned all the Shaolin Kung Fu from my piaomeis !

If u really need to find out where to whip, veli simple ! JUST ON THE LIGHT LA ! HAHAHAHH !

Boil or fry condoms? Please check with Ah May ! She is the cooking expert !

Wearing ring for religious purposes only apply during Thaipusam la ! I am sure you Amedika peeple no celebrate Thaipusam wan ! LOL!

Wah ! Your grandma and aunties also got the LinPeh bag ? LOL!

You sounds expereince with the double layer S&M thing ;-) when u free ah ? LOL!

Blogger JoMel condemn:

I never knew the function of a penis ring, but I do now. Tenkiu for the enlightenment. But how come your bag no have handcuffs? I'm disappointed.

Blogger Simple American condemn:

Jomel just sked me.

Thaipusam huh. Dun that get celebrated everytime a US aircraft carrier docks?

Blogger me condemn:

your music very "keng" lah. want to pretend to work and then silently surf the blogosphere, suddenly your music blasting for everybody to hear. people thinking i surfing x-rated music sites lah. i must remember to turn volume down before coming again *grins*

Anonymous TUX condemn:

The pouch missing Wingz super strength magic sponge for all the spill over from the double comdom.

Hey, BTW, on the Magnum XL condom you can see silver serial number after you roll it all the way down (on the thicker part of the ring).

Blogger wombie condemn:

tux must be speaking from experience *ahem* ;)

Blogger osiruz condemn:

lol...i like the idea of double layer with minyak angin...kekeke :P too bad no handcuffs or rope or leather straps...u shud mass produced the bag man...keke

Add your condemn