Tok 3 Tok 4

Friday, February 17, 2006

Untold History: Malaysian Chinese Name

It's a normal practice nowadays for the Malaysian Chinese peoples to have an Engrish name. Just look around and you will find that most peoples (including yourself), whether got go skool or no go skool also got Engrish name one. For example, our bloggers here also got Engrish names such as Vincent Tan, Patrik Teoh, Amber Chia etc even tho all of them are Cinapek or Cinamui !

Like many other peoples, Lin Peh also very curious about why the Chinese like to use Engrish name. So, during the recent Gong Xi Fa Chai horliday, Lin Peh did a very extensive reseach on the evolution of chinese names and here's is the report:

EVOLUTION OF MALAYSIAN CHINESE NAMES

1940's
This is the time when the world was at War and shit like dat. So, to prevent their children being caught by the enemy or recruited to do national service (we toking real NS, not the current type of sing song malaysia boleh type of NS), most peoples will name their kids after animal such as: Ah Kao (Dog), Ah Mao (Cat), Ah Tu (Pig) so that the gaoment and/or enemy don't know they actually got people live in the house.

1950's
The war is over and the gaoment was at a lost because the peoples no need to hide, no need to fight and basically nothing to do and simply fucked up. So, gaoment start building skools to educate the rakyat and the rakyat also start sending their children to skool because gaoment said only communist no go skool wan. In order to show off to their neighbour that they got go skool, the peoples started a trend of giving more high crass and complicated names to their children but of course they still stick to the tradition of naming their children after animals. So, instead of just a simple animal name like Ah Kao & Ah Mao, the peoples will add adjecktif to the animal; sample is like Or Gao (black dog), Tai Ban Jiong (Big Stupid Elephant), Lou Mao (old cat), Tua Goo (Big cow) etc. That's why many of your relatives and friends who were borned during the 50s got this type of names.

1960's
Unknown to many, a big turning point during the whole evolution was due to a couple by the name of Ah Beng and Ah Hui who never go to skool. Because Ah Beng and Ah Hui never go skool so when their first baby was borned they got problem in naming the baby. After trying all sorts of names for weeks, they finally gave up and decided to ask the neighbour for assistance cause the neighbour got go skool. But they know the neighbour will probably laugh at them if they approach the neighbour directly so Ah Beng and Ah Hui came up with a solution. They decided that Ah Beng will go near the neighbour house on the next morning and listen to what the neighbour said and use the first words the neighbour said as the name of the baby.

So, on the next morning, Ah Beng quietly walked over to the neighbours house like looking for his dog like dat and suddenly he heard the neighbour said to the wife "Lo Min Poon lei" (take the basin over here). Very happy, Ah Beng went home and named the baby Min Poon and from then on, whole kampong no one dare to look down on them cause Min Poon is a very good high crass name.

Two years later, Ah Beng and Ah Hui got their second baby, So, they decided to use the same teknik to name the baby. The morning after the baby was borned, Ah Beng walked over to the neighbour's house like what he did 2 years ago and curi curi listen to what the neighbour was saying. However, the neighbour was reading the newspaper and found out that the hamsem looking USA president was shot so he shouted "Chi Bye!" Ah Beng quickly went home and told Ah Hui that the baby name is Chi Bye.

As the years gone by, both Min Poon and Chi Bye grew up healthy and happy. One day, their long time no see grandmother came visit and Ah Beng & Ah Hui quickly asked their kids to greet the grandma. The grandma, having not seen the 2 kids for long time, happily said it loud loud: Wah....! Long time no see lor ! This Chi Bye grow so big until bigger than Min Poon lor !


Big Leh ?


So, from the day onwards, the whole kampong decided to use Engrish name for their children to prevent the same type of shit from happening again. Ladies and genitalmen, if you have an Engrish name, please tank Q Ah Beng, Ah Hui, Min Poon and Chi Bye !

10 Condeminations:

Blogger Wingz condemn:

wuahahahaha min poon and chi bye!!!!

Blogger King's wife condemn:

hahaha...and what is your chibye engrish name??

Blogger Helen condemn:

English names are much easier to remember. Is Lin Peh english version of the Hokkien word Lan Pah??

Blogger 5xmom.com condemn:

Aiyoh,dun say me likedat la. My dad was a China migrant who made it good in Malaya by becoming an English teacher. He gave all his daughters English names in our birth certs probably because he kamtung the English for educating him. You know sail all the way from Hainan island and reach here and find a good job. But his sons all got those cousins for generations kinda Chinese name.

Blogger She's Jess condemn:

Interesting. LoL

Blogger Cocka Doodle condemn:

Traditionally, these christian names are christened after the saints.
These days, you'll find weird names like Rolex Tan, Elsky Wong, Bond Lim etc. Sometimes they can't even tell the first names from the last names and start putting last names as their first. Makes a good laugh!

Blogger wombie condemn:

don't forget food names: Apple, Orange, Cherry, Mango, Candy etc. I wonder if people would name their kids or themselves Pineapple, Papaya, Keropok, Satay, Chicken Rice, Durian etc

hahahaha...

Blogger Lin Peh condemn:

Wingz:
Big leh ?

King's wife:
Lin Peh engrish name is the very complicated wan la. Tiao u oso u no understand wan la.

Helen:
Where the fuck you learn Engrish wan ? English version of the Hokkien word Lan Pah is call BALLS la ;-)

5xmom:
So, your name Lilian is not named after the fat lady who tok wind water wan la ?

She's Jess:
Untold History sure la interesting ;-)

Siao Cha Bor:
You think Lin Peh no brithcert wan ah ?

Cocka Doodle:
Maybe we must start telling those Angmor to give Chinese name so next time we can have President Chibye Bush, Vice President Lanjiao Channey. LOL!

simmie:
Not bad idea. Local fruit certainly sounds more original than those Apple, Orange, Pear. Maybe you can consider naming yourself Langsat Lang, Rambutan Lang, Maggis Lang ;-)

Blogger Lil Patchee condemn:

Like that I must thank you Min Poon liao, mine was in the birth cert.

Blogger ZMM condemn:

*pengsan*

Add your condemn