Tok 3 Tok 4

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ATTENTION

Only a few days left for you to Sing Song for Christmas.

Remember to Party for Year End.

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Here are the list of the greatest women tennis players of all time as compiled by Lin Peh:

Billie Jean King

King is undeniably the most important women��s tennis players of all-time and possibly the most important figure in the evolution of women��s sports. King won 12 Grand Slam singles titles, 14 Grand Slam women's doubles titles, and 11 Grand Slam mixed doubles titles.


Martina Navratilova

Navratilova won 18 Grand Slam singles titles and 40 Grand Slam doubles titles (31 women's doubles and 9 mixed doubles). She also won the women's singles title at Wimbledon a record 9 times.


Chris Evert

Evert won 18 Grand Slam singles titles, including a record seven at the French Open. Evert also won three Grand Slam doubles titles and sports a career win-loss record in singles matches of 1,309-146 (.900) - the best of any professional player in tennis history, male or female.


Steffi Graf

Graf is undoubtedly one of the greatest female tennis players ever �� if not the best. Graf won an amazing 22 Grand Slam singles titles and in 1988, became the only player to achieve the "Golden Slam" �� capturing all four Grand Slam singles titles and the Olympic gold medal in the same year.


Maria Sharapova

Despite her young age, Maria Sharapova has reached such a superb accomplishment in her profession as a tennis player. Throughout her career, she has collected a series of titles: one in Grand Slam, WTA Championships, Tier I Event, and seven in WTA Tour Tournaments. Furthermore, she also has received 4 WTA Awards that were WTA Newcomer of the Year in 2003, WTA Player of the Year, Most Improved Player of the Year, and Player Service which were all honored in 2004.


AND HERE...UP AND CUMMING PLAYER

Hoe Lynn Tai
Compared to the the players mentioned above, Hoe Lynn Tai is indeed the one who has the best skill in ball control! She is a student of Lin Peh and with her excellent technique and talent, she undoubtedly has the potential to become the best tennis player in the world. If you no belif, please watch the following video:

Tech Tags: Funny humor homour tennis Billie+Jean+King Martina+Navratilova Chris+Evert Steffi+Graf Maria+Sharapova

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ATTENTION

Only a few days left for you to Sing Song for Christmas.

Remember to Party for Year End.

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Here is a special MTV for all my readers ! Enjoy:

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ATTENTION

Remember to Sing Song for Christmas.

Remember to Party for Year End.

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Many peeples do not understand how to solve problem in a proper manner. When they encounter a problem, all they do are blame, point fingers and attend genral asssembly! By doing so, not only they don't solve the problems, they actually create more problems !

Long time ago, Lin Peh was told by Confucious one old man that the highest level of problem solving skill is called "PROBLEM SOLVING PROBLEM". This method of problem solving is to actually look carefully into the root of the problem and then match them with another problem ! You will be surprise that of a lot of times, the problem will cancel out each other ! Sounds complicated huh ? Don't worry, because Lin Peh will now show you some examples by analysing the problems Malaysia is facing now and see how we can solve them all:

Example 1:



Problem 1:
The accident rate in Malaysia in very high. Many fuckers don't seems to know how to drive! So much so until the Police has to come out with OPERASI during every festive seasons to keep track of how many peeples die per day on the road!

Problem 2:
Bunch of illegal racers who called themselves Mat Cermelang (formerly known as Mat-Rempit) always create problems especially during middle of night! Lately, they even think they got support from some higher authority and start behaving like Mat-Chibye and wack the police like the country has no gaoment like dat !

Solution:
Match Problem 1 and 2. Close the highway during the middle of night and let all the Mat Chibye go race there ! No innocent life will be lost on the highway, residences no more complain about the noise from the motorbike, police can go chase after criminals instead of busy kena chased by the Mat Chibye and at the same time these Mat Chibye will all die in just matter of time! 2 problems solved!


Example 2:



Problem 3:
Seems like the gaoment is having a lot of problems in calculating the "wealth distribution" among the peeples. If you see the newspaper, the results they announce all difference different one. Making everyone so confuse dunno which one to believe.

Problem 4:
It seems that our students all score many many A's in their exams until many peeple complains that our country is running out of A's already. But the problem is when they grow up and graduate from university, many cannot even find a job. To make it worst, the foreign media always give our university low ranking and condemn our education system somemore! However, our gaoment still very positive and insist that we have the best education system in the region! Making everyone so confuse dunno which one to believe.

Solution:
Match Problem 3 and 4. Since gaoment wants to prove to others that our straight A's students actually damn smart one, get the students to calculate the percentage la ! Lin Peh sure they all can do a better job cause they don't get straight A's for no reason one! So, once and for all, no one can dispute the figure calculated anymore and foreign media also cannot condemn that our students no quality anymore. 2 problems solved!


Example 3:


Problem 5:
Got one specky fucker build one big mansion without permit but no one seems to have the guts to go and tear it down. Many peeples angry !

Problem 6:
Someone (don't know who) got access to excessive explosive of the police and use it to bomb dead body. Peeples all shock and all the media, including the foreign ones, all watching it closely. Really no good for the country!

Solution:
Match Problem 5 and 6. Do I need to say more ? ;-)


Example 4:



Problem 7:
The year 2007, suppose to be Visit Malaysia Year but it seems that not much work has been done to promote it.

Problem 8:
The Penang Municipal Council installed CCTV in their meeting room to zoom in on the thighs of women journalists. The President, Datuk Abu Bakar Hassan, came to their defense and said the incident was caused by the “sexy” attire worn by some women reporters ! Peeples hear already all damn tulan !

Solution:
Match problem 7 and 8 and we can get Datuk Abu Bakar Hassan to use his CCTV and make a movie to promote Visit Malaysia 2007 ! Sure the movie damn HOT wan! Sure many peeples go download wan ! LOL !


Exercise:

Ok la. After showing you so many examples, it's time for you to practise the skill of "Problem Solving Problem". Please solve the below yourself! HAHAHAHAHAH!

Tech Tags: humor humour funny malaysia problem

As a continuation from the previous Sing Song Projeck, Lin Peh hereby officially launch the the Sing Song projeck for Xmas 2006 entitled:

"RUDOLF IN YOUR HOUSE !"

For those of you who got experience with the previous projecks, the game plan is still the same. For those who are virgins and never try before, this projeck is very simple one; all the participants will record their own singing of this song in mp3 format and email it to Lin Peh. Lin Peh will then arrange and remix them and make it Hot Hot liddat! Simple leh ?

However, before you begin, you may want to download the original Cowboy Version of the song by right click HERE and practice a bit.

Once you think you are good enough to join, please do the following:

1. Download the kalaoke file (RudolfM.mp3) by right click on the link HERE

2. Sing the song and record it down. Try your bestest to sing according to the correct tempo and key! Don't blow into the mic because it will sounds like PORNO! Get your Piao Ker/Piao Mei to help listen to it after you sing, if no piao ker/piao mei, get your indon maid to listen also can la.

3. When doing the recording, make sure to use a headphone to listen to the music while you sing directly into the mic. That means, record only your voice! Please don't record down the music or noises from your surrounding especially those uh-uh ah-ah from your porno DVD ;-)

4. Send your recording in mp3 format to Lin Peh at xymalaysia@yahoo.com by Thursday, November 30.

5. Please remember to tell Lin Peh who the fuck you are by including your Blog Name when your send in your recording so that you will be paid in case RTM wants to play the song. LOL!

6. Check this blog regularly for the update of this project.

Hope to "hear" from you all very soon ! Enjoy yours singing!

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Here is the Lyrics of the Song in Case you Dunno
Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer

You know Dasher, and Dancer, and Prancer, and Vixen,
Comet, and Cupid, and Donner and Blitzen
But do you recall
The most famous reindeer of all

Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer
Had a very shiny nose
And if you ever saw it
You would even say it glows.

All of the other reindeer
Used to laugh and call him names
They never let poor Rudolph
Join in any reindeer games.

Then one foggy Christmas eve
Santa came to say:
"Rudolph with your nose so bright,
won't you guide my sleigh tonight?"

Then all the reindeer loved him
As they shouted out with glee,
Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer,
You'll go down in history!

Tech Tags: Christmas karaoke sing song project bloggers Rudolph

Question:
A mother is 21 years older than the child.
6 years from now the mother will be 5 times as old as the child.

So, Where is the father?


Don't Cheat ! Try first, before you check the answer below.

















Answer:
The mother(M) is 21 years older than the child(C).
M = C + 21

In 6 years from now the mum will be 5 times as old as the child.
M + 6 = (C + 6) x 5

Therefore,
C + 21 + 6 = (C + 6) x 5
C + 27 = 5C + 30
4C = -3
C = -3/4

The child is -3/4 years old! Which means the child will be born in 9 months time !

Thus, by mathematical deduction:

The father is on top of the mother!

Tech Tags: Mathematics Funny Humour Humor Adult

After all the meetings, FFK and tiu tiu, Lin Peh hereby very honour to annouce to you the 2006 Year End Bloogers Party

Bloggers Together-Gather !



When: 30 December 2006

What Time: Evening lor

Where: Sky Room, Federal Hotel

Who will be there: All the gila bloggers (serious one all stay home TFK so they won't cum)

What to expect: An evening of fun dining, wining and sixtyning !

What to wear: Something nice la (if you dun wear anything at all, Lin Peh belanja!)

How much: RM100 (Cheap cheap only, sure you can afford wan)

We made a blog specially dedicated to this party! Check it out and register
HERE!
Our very friendly and sexy sales representatives will get in touch with you.

Tech Tags: malaysia bloggers party

1. Identify the land



2. Site Clearance

Hopefulyl the piece of land that you have identified is liddis one:



If it is liddis one, then a bit susah to clear:



But Don't worry la, because you can just do this:




3. Start Building:



4. Work in Progress:




5. Final Product:




Please remember that you must meet the following requirements before you proceed with the contruction of your mansion:

1. You current house must be SMALL!

2. Your family must have at least 25 peeples!

3. You must wear a designer glasses which look liddis!


4. You must have been a bankrupt before!

5. You must get ready RM24,000 to pay the maximum fine!



p.s. In case you serve satay at your House Warming party, please get it from the following Satay Restaurant:

Tech Tags: malaysia humor humour politics funny zakaria mansion istana

HERE IS A SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT:

To celebrate the 18th birthday of Rojak's granddotter, a committee which consist Wingz, HizeCool, Hippo, Batu Kenny, Jolene, 9393, Aceone and a few more has been formed to organise a party called Bloggers Together Gather. The list of the committe here is non comprehensive and it is still growing at the time of publication just like the kkc grow when see piaomei liddat ! However, before they can grow any longer, the piaomeis are are screaming for help already!



They all need some good peeples with the following talents:



Seriously, this is no kidding business, if you no belif, you can proceed to all the weblink above just to prove that they're taking this projeck seriously.

Anyway, before you write in to volunteer, please understand that voluntary means you don't ask for money, goodies or any free iLin Produck. HAHAHAHA ! However, you may get lucky while participating in this projeck (example...free volunteer BJ from Hippo or free volunteer yamade from Cocka) hahahahaha ! So, those who are really interested, please email rojaks.wingz@gmail.com

If you don't think that you have the talent but you are really interested in helping out, you may also write in and tell Wingz what you can offer. (Negerian prince with lots of money please do not write). Just for your info, Wingz and Hippo will welcome you with their open arms if you volunteer to be the spokesmodel for the event by dressing up like this:
Remember to lift the skirt high high and even more authentic if your bulu kaki sticking out thru the socks!

This is the end of special announcement and of course looking forward to hear from you soon.

Regards,
Lin Peh