Tok 3 Tok 4

After Lin Peh's previous post on Wingz sing the Ah Beng song, many peeples request that Lin Peh post more because they all enjoy it very very much ! So, due to popular demand, naaaah.....WINGZ CAN SING ! AGAIN!

Tech Tags: vulgar funny hokkien song humour humor lanjiao chibye

Last night, Lin Peh went to a night club "accidently" and to my surprise, Lin Peh saw that Wingz was performing there with his Ah Beng Band! So, Lin Peh quickly took out camera and recorded his performance because good thing must share!

Warning: WINGZ CAN SING ! LOL!

Tech Tags: vulgar funny hokkien song humour humor lanjiao chibye

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ATTENTION

Last call for you to Sing Song for Chinese New Year.

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By now, Lin Peh sure all of you are aware and concern about the case of our fellow Malaysian bloggers Rocky Bru & Jeff Ooi kena sued by NSTP. Some bloggers so tulan until they group together and called themselves Manchester Bloggers United to voice their concern ! Even the Prime Minister also show his concern and said "Bloggers must be responsible for what they write on the Internet as there are laws on defamation and sedition"



So, today Lin Peh will do my part as a netsponsible blogger by giving you all the tips on how NOT TO get yourself in trouble !

Tip No 1: Don't Lie!
Just like in real life, you are not allow to tell lie in your blog. So, you better make fucking sure that everything you write is true one. For example, if you want to say that Cocka punya kkc is damn small, make sure you verify and confirm that it is actually very small ! If not, cocka can sue you wan ! On the other hand, if Cocka actually sue you, please ask him to produce his IC and verify that his name is Cocka! If he can't do so, you may sue him back for lying about his name! HAHAHA!

Tip No 2: Don't Say You Don't Like Me
This is very straight forward! Just like in real life, if you don't like someone, don't say it in front of him, SAY IT BEHIND HIM! TELL THE WHOLE WORLD BUT NOT HIM! HAHAHA! For example, let's say if you don't like Rojak, don't say it at your own blog, you can go say it at Aceone punya condemn box ! Like that many people will know except Rojak because he told Lin Peh he never read Aceone's sorhai turtle blog! HAHAHA!

Tip No 3: Don't Say Whatever Produck is No Good
For those of you who like to review produck in your blog, you are only allow to say good thing about it. Don't ever say the bad things ! Cause all the big big corporation usually employ a lot of lawyers. All these lawyers job is to sit in front of computer and look for someone to sue. (Of course, most of the time they just pretend that they are working by surfing all the porn site and TFK!) So, when you say their produck no good, you may be sued until your pants also drop !

However, according to Rule No 1, you should not lie! So, if their produck is damn fucking screwed, you just keep quiet. Your smart readers will know what you mean. For example, when you review the performance of Proton Tiara, you just put a pic like this:



and then you keep quiet......

Tip No 4: Don't Say Gaoment is No Good
When you want to condemn the gaoment, make sure you word your condemn carefully. Some peeple really look for trouble by condeming the gaoment with words such as STUPID, CORRUPTED, ARROGANT, FUCKED UP, MENTALLY RETARDED! My friends...if you use those words, you are really asking for it! Even god cannot help you la ! So, Lin Peh repeat, please DO NOT SAY that the Gaoment is STUPID, gaoments officers CORRUPTED, cabinet ministers ARROGANT, education system FUCKED UP, voters MENTALLY RETARDED! Understand ?

Tip No 5: Always Pull Other Peeples Into The Water
Use "Quote" in your posting just like in real life! If you want to say something controversial, you don't want to be known as the original fella. Always say "according to so and so...whetever...". For example: According to Lim Kit Siang, Malaysia Goament is Half Pass Six! Like that if gaoment want to catch also they go after Lim Kit Siang instead of you! HAHAHAH!

That's the tips on Safe Blogging for now! You too can be a netsponsible bloggers if you follow them. No one will come sue you! HAHAHA!

Happy Blogging !

Tech Tags: Malaysia Lawsuit Humor Humour Bloggers

How good are you when you yamade? So good until your neighbour also envy you? Or so bad until you jehles of your neighbour who always send the loud loud sound effect to your place middle or night until you so tulan ?

Actually, we all no need to envy or jehles about others because you never know what's actually happening.

For example:

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ATTENTION

Only a few days left for you to Sing Song for Chinese New Year.

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Recently, Lin Peh punya friends 5xMom and Rojak created a site call FrenzRSS and Lin Peh have promised them to help promote a bit.

Just like the old Chinese saying "Thou shall not be fucked by 5Xmom and Rojak", so Lin Peh better make this special post to promote kao their FrenzRSS before they both come fuck kao Lin Peh. HAHA !

What is FrenzRSS?
FrenzRSS is like a directory but better than your normal phone directory because the update is so damn fast, almost realtime like that! No need to wait one year! Once you registered with FrenzRSS, your latest post will appear at the directory automatically and almost immediately! So, very easy for peeple to know when you updated your blog. At the same time, you make sure you bookmark the FrenzRSS page and go there often to see whether your piaoker piaomei updated their blog also! That's what FrenzRSS are for !

How to Register
This one very easy and they don't ask for your mother's name wan! ;-)

First you go to http://frenzrss.com and click on the SIGN UP HERE



Then, you just fill in the form lor! Anyway, before you fill in the form, please check and see whether your RSS link is correct by copying the address into your browser and see whether it works.

Your RSS link shall look something like this :
For Blogspot - http://yourblogname.blogspot.com/atom.xml
For Non-Blogspot - http://yourblogname.com/rss

If the RSS link leads to a page with all your posts that means everything is in order and you are ready to register liao. If got error message, please check your eyes because you have probably copy the RSS link worngly!

The next step is to go ahead and fill in the form like the following samples and remember to hit SUBMIT

For Blogspot:



For Non-Blospot:



Of course, please remember to replace Elvis Presley with your own info. However, if your name is really Elvis Presley, please contact Lin Peh because THE WHOLE WORLD IS LOOKING FOR YOU !

That's all. Simple and Useful !

Tech Tags: FrenzRSS RSS Humor Humour Malaysia

Due to popular demand, Lin Peh is hereby inviting all of you to participate in this year's Chinese New Year Sing Song projeck entitled:

新年来罗 (Engrish: Xin Nian Lai Lor)

For those of you who got experience with the previous projecks, the pattern is still the same. For those who are never done before, go tah fei kei la ! (or read further for instruction..haha)

However, before you begin, you may want to download the sample version of the song by right click HERE (or HERE also can) and practice a bit.

Once you think you are good enough to join, please do the following:

1. Download the kalaoke file (hxn_kala.mp3) by right click on the link HERE (or HERE also can)

2. Sing the song and record it down. Try your bestest to sing according to the correct tempo and key! Don't blow into the mic because it will sounds like PORNO!

3. When doing the recording, make sure to use a headphone to listen to the music while you sing directly into the mic. That means, record only your voice! Please don't record down the music or noises from your surrounding especially those uh-uh ah-ah from your porno DVD ;-)

4. Send your recording in mp3 format to Lin Peh at xymalaysia@yahoo.com by Sunday, January 28.

5. Please remember to tell Lin Peh who the fuck you are by including your Blog Name when your send in your recording so that you will be invited to the Granny Award in case we kena nominated! LOL!

6. Check this blog regularly for the update of this project.

Hope to "hear" from you all very soon ! Enjoy yours singing!

Xin Nian Lai Lor!!!!

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Here is the Lyrics of the Song in Case you Dunno

賀新年

賀新年 祝新年
新年啊 年連年
爆竹聲聲催人想幼年

賀新年 祝新年
新年啊 年連年
歲月悠悠光陰似箭

回首往事如煙痛苦辛酸
寄望從今萬事如願

賀新年 祝新年
新年哪 年連年
願大家都過個太平年



In Engrish:

He Xin Nian

He xin nian Zhu xin nian
Xin nian ah Nian lian nian
Bao zhu sheng sheng cui de xiang you nian

He xin nian Zhu xin nian
Xin nian ah Nian lian nian
Sui yue you you guang yin shi jian

Hui shou wang shi ru yan tong ku xing suan
Ji wang cong jin wan shi ru yuan

He xin nian Zhu xin nian
Xin nian la Nian lian nian
Yuan ta jia dou guo ge tai ping nian


Note:
Special tank Q to 5xMom punya FRENZRSS and John Ong: for providing the server space to host the files. Tank Q you 2!

Tech Tags: chinese+new+year karaoke sing song bloggers

The year 2006 was a very succesful year for OLIN especially with its world renowned iPiaomei.

Due to popular demand, Lin Peh has decided to cum out with a smaller version of the iPiaomei which is more portable and more affordable and still achieving the same results. With this new product, the wishes of millions of OLIN followers cum tru!

OLIN is proud to present to you its latest produck:

iPiaomei Nano



Very easy to carry around

Got cover somemore!




Four Different Models Available

1) iPiaomei Nano - Normal (Model No: PU55Y)


iPiaomei Nano - Oral (Model No: BJ69)


iPiaomei Nano - Anal (Model No: A55)


iPiaomei Nano - Animal (Model No: 51CK0)



Another Great Produck by:

Tech Tags: Humor Humour Funny Adult+Toy

Niamafulatt! it seems like the internet connection still very condemn even tho the TV got show some divers repairing the cables under the sea. Recently, newspaper also got report that many bloggers very pissed off because cannot blog ! They even show one blogger so tulan until the face look like want to commit suicide liddat! That shows how dependant we are on the internet! Tiu !

Actually, Lin Peh also long time no post already! My last post was in 2006...WAH! Almost one year already wor! By now I think many peeples thinking Lin Peh kena exploded while yamadeing in Bangkok or kena hanged by the US gaoment while doing chemistry experiment in the cave ! HAHAHA!

So, before you all decided to abandon Lin Peh's Blog, Lin Peh die die also must post something just to keep you all know Lin Peh not yet die.

Since the connection is so slow and many bloggers facing the same problem, Lin Peh will tell you what we can do to help out as good bloggers and bloggees. Here are my Prefessional Advice:

For Bloggers:

1. Don't post movie of your baby trying to walk or to tok because no one actually give a shit about it! To tell you the thruth, many readers usually comment "So cute...", "I am amazed..." etc before they even see the movie! LOL!

2. Don't post picture of your christmas present! Reason ? See No.1 above! LOL!

3. Don't write long story and complain about the gaoment because there is nothing new ! LOL!

4. DON'T POST!

5. Ok la...if your really need to post...post something like this one


For Bloggees:

1. Don't waste your time waiting to download non-humsap movie or picture ;-)

2. When visiting those humsap blogs but see a blank page; USE YOUR IMAGINATION and start TFK! HAHAHAH!

3. Don't spam the comment box by offering penis enlargement medicine or multiple orgasm pills; ALL THE MALE BLOGGERS DICK ALL LONG LONG and FEMALE BLOGGERS ALL STIM STIM ALREADY ! LOL!

4. Stare at blank page and laugh loud loud as if you are reading something really funny. This will make your colleagues jealous and screw up their performence ! Like that you will get better increment !

5. If No.4 not applicable to you, you better stop wasting your time reading blog and GO BACK TO WORK ! LOL!